Blood Is Thicker Than Water

A few days over four years ago, my dear Yeh Yeh embarked on the second (and the best) chapter of his life - to enjoy a life of eternal joy and peace in heaven. And to celebrate the great man that he was, his children, children-in-law and grandchildren got together to do what Malaysians do best at every special occassion: eat.

Since i was too busy tucking in (when you're eating with my family, you better be fast... because the slowest of em' all ends up with nothing on their plate!) after a tiring day of visiting my departed loved ones and inspecting a new house, i thought i'd hand the photographer duty over to my five-year-old cousin.




Anti-clockwise from top right: if you can't tell from the obvious hints, we went to a Chinese restaurant (that provides tissue bought from Tesco) for dinner, had steamed fish amongst other Chinese dishes and washed it all down with soft drinks and red wine. And the picture on the bottom right? A self-taken picture of the photographer. So young and already a camtoddler, oh what has the world turned into?




When a few of the teenage cousins were busy playing with their phones at the table...

Me: Look at the young ones these days, always with their phones.
Esa: When we were their age, we only had toys! And had to eat quietly.
Nick: When has our family EVER shared a meal quietly?
All three: [laugh]

Come to think of it, it's true. The rule of not talking while eating certainly doesn't apply in this clan. My family runs on chaos and noise! Some of the wacky things that have happened at dining tables across Kuala Lumpur and Petaling Jaya include dipping lollipops into a concoction of Coke and Sprite before popping em into mouths, pants unknowingly dropping to knee level and revealing the wearer's panties, an onion slice flying from the inside of one mouth onto the plate of another, and daring each other to consume fish's eyes for RM10. Crazy? That's how we roll.


Get Off My Lawn!

The car made a turn into the front porch, outside my house's gate. I opened the door, getting ready to do my usual after-work-'How are you?' greeting exchange with Zipper. Before slamming the car door shut, i turned to look at the bush of purple flowers at the lawn next to me. Something didn't feel right.

I looked harder and there, in the bush, something was looking back at me. Because the sun has set, the light has gone off for the day and everything seemed to be a blur. I still didn't know what was odd about the bush. Then somehow something clicked and i blurted loudly "Ohmigosh. A snake!". The thing heard me, turned and slithered back into the bush. Mind you, it was NOT small. It was about 1.5 inches thick!

I stood there for a few seconds as my mind tried to register what my eyes just saw. I noticed its tail slowly creeping back amongst the leaves. It was green, and i believe had a yellow and black stripe running along its sides. Ohmigosh, i just saw a snake and i wasn't at the zoo!

Mom thought i was joking until she saw me standing still for quite a while. Fear overtook me and my body simply didn't know how to response. What the heck are you supposed to do when you see a snake? Sure, you've watched movies on snake encounters but when the real thing happens to you, for the first few moments, all the knowledge you've acquired is as good as none.

So i brought Zipper into the house and closed the doors. I sure as heck wouldn't want any thing slithering into my home! My heart was racing. I did the only thing i knew. I called the DBKL. No answer. Great. Then i dialed 994. Great, it's engaged. Then i contacted the Fire and Rescue Department and praise the Lord, someone finally picked up! They passed my details to the firemen and within a few minutes, a huge fire truck was parked outside my house (very speedy response! i initially thought they wouldn't care).

The firemen started looking around. Neighbours came out to see. I heard people saying "There's a snake? Don't scare me lah". I was praying that they would find it and, although i love animals, kill it. I dislike snakes. Especially ones that are not trapped in cages.

The men came into my garden, looked about and still no sign of the green creature. That moment, i wondered if neighbours thought i was hallucinating because as luck would have it, i was the only one in the entire crowd who saw it. Then after a while, the men and their big truck with the siren lights flashing headed back to wherever they came from.

My heart sank. Why did they leave without catching the snake? They're supposed to overturn every stone, chop down every tree, dig every hole until the thing is found! But of course, you can't go on hunting for something you don't see. Knowing that it could probably still be out there scares the crap out of me.

Oh, what a day today has been! Snake, please go away thank you.

Oh, Look Who We Have Here

Over the past few weeks, i was granted the opportunity to speak to and meet a couple of TV's popular faces...



Out of all the hosts i've met, leave it to Ian Wright to make the craziest entrance ever. No, appearing casually out of nowhere onto the stage is simply not his thing. This avid travel junkie has to take it a notch higher by doing a sexy shadow dance then crash through a paper wall and onto the floor. It was insane!

The man makes a great story teller too. I would be happy to just sit and listen to his stories the whole day. Here's one.

According to him, Damascus, Syria is the best place for souvenir shopping because they've got the craziest lingeries in town, despite being a religious center. Hey, holy people need some crazy sex once in a while too. There are knickers that play tunes - from Happy Birthday to Love Story - and more recently, Ian discovered that they've got a one-of-a-kind bra. Both the cups are made of feather and with one clap, all the feathers will drop, revealing the boobs of the wearer. How insanely kinky!

Then there's my French affair with one very tall and pretty Laura Calder. On that day, in a restaurant at the Berjaya School of Hospitality and Tourism, she took away my French food virginity.







Now, i wonder if i'll ever get to meet Rocco Dispirito and Jamie Oliver? Discovery Travel & Living and Asian Food Channel, hook me up please!

She's Six Foot One

While i was channel surfing last week, i came across this TV series on Granada TV (Ch 735) that's hillarious! It's about Miranda, an awkward 34-year-old woman who tries to fit in with her girly friends and strives to win the affection of her (very hot!) friend Gary. This is the first episode of the series...







I sorta see myself in her in the sense that i get pretty nervous around the guy i like too. Definitely one of the funniest characters i've seen on TV to date. I hope she'll leave you in stitches as she did to me. Enjoy!

More of the episodes are available here. Or you could simply tune into Granada every Friday nights at either 6.30pm, 8.30pm or 12.30am.

Damn, the Gary dude is really, really hot.

When Crazy Meets Crazy

Before you read on, you should know that:

A. I am a fan of the TV series Supernatural
B. Supernatural focuses on two insanely hot demon-hunting brothers Sam and Dean
C. I heart Sam and sometimes pretends that he's mine
D. My friend Ee Laine hearts Dean

So, while i was at work today, i got an email from Ee Laine:

Ello ello...free to have lunch today?
Of course i am. My husband is filming Season 6 with your husband mah. So no time to be with me. One day we should surprise them and fly to their filming location!
We should! Erm, i just realised that i didn't bring money, would you mind paying it for me first? I'll have Dean bank the money into your account later.
No need to bank in so susah lah. Just tell Dean to pass it to Sam. Sam will pass it to me when i see him this weekend. We're flying to South Africa to live in an expensive safari hotel cos he knows i love animals. How sweet. I heard you have something planned with Dean this weekend too! You joining him for demon hunting?
Sam tells you everything huh? We decided to take a break from demon hunting and do something romantic. Seaside maybe. Lay on the sand in his arms, look at the stars...but if we bump into a demon half way, then we might change plan. We're spontaneous!

I was fully expecting to see a reply going, "Wake up woman! You're dreaming!" but no, girl layan my imagination and played along. Yay! I love my crazy friends!

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