Monday, June 28, 2010

A Long Lost Me

I had to make origami for work the other day and was rummaging through my shelves when i stumbled upon these:






I'm not good at drawing really because all these drawings are something i've replicated from drawings seen in my Enid Blyton books, comics and whatnot. Nothing that i created on my own but still, i think i make a rather okay copycat back then. I remember spending nights in my room secretly drawing when i was supposed to be studying.

I miss that.

I miss the creative energy i used to have. Not only did i draw, i also enjoyed playing the piano and singing simultaneously. I attended auditions (sing, dance, host - i've done it), i performed during school events, i agreed to coach my class for our inter-class choir competition...then somehow all these started to stop one by one.

Self-conciousness hit and i guess i am no longer as confident as i once was. I think i'm too fat for showbiz. Too ugly for TV. My voice is mediocre for the singing industry. My drawings are well, not technically my own creation. I suck at piano and my dancing, well, who wants to see a hippo dance?

It's really sad because doing those things really did make me happy.

Old Lea, i hope to find you again.

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