Men, Listen Up

Here are five ways to scare away and destroy what little friendship you have with a girl you just barely got to know:

Instead of the usual 'hi' or 'hello', begin a conversation by telling her to hold your hand.

Call her a few hours after she gives you her mobile number. Then a few seconds or a minute into the conversation, tell her you need to hang up and say that you'll call back. Repeat this several times.

If she does not pick up the phone, call her a few more times in one day, just to try your luck. It is okay to also call her after midnight on a weekend.

In your first phone conversation with her, tell her to marry you. Emphasise this point by repeating it several times. Do not forget to also tell her to speak to you in a sexy voice. To really hit the nail on its head, criticise her looks by saying "Do you know how you can be a good wife and daughter? You should [insert criticism here]". For example, try "You shouldn't wear glasses. You should wear contacts".

Do not ask her out for dinner. TELL her to have dinner with you.